A year of pink!!!!

It's been a year of pink dresses, pink bows, pink paint, pink crazy.........and more and more pink. When I was pregnant with my daughter Milah we chose to wait to find out the sex and I'm so glad we waited. The "it's a girl" moment that we had anticipated and wished for turn to be real and not a dream. We were over the moon and completely in love. She had no idea how spoiled she would be. Being the only granddaughter on both sides and being the baby sister of two big brothers. My husband at my request went out and got a pink stroller, pink swing and pink coming home clothes. After so much blue I was going pink. 

I had often seen the closeness the boys had with my husband Fabio. He was their idol. Their hero....their daddy could do anything....he's the strongest person in the world (he really is). I was their mother and they loved me but the bond between father and sons was unbreakable. I would see them playing in the backyard and I would yearn to have a pal of my own, my own little girl looking up at me in adoring eyes. Yes, my boys only want their mommy when their sick and they can't live without me and they stalk me often but I wanted my girl. My girl to go get my nails done with....to get my hair done with.....to talk about how crazy the other three boys in the family were and my girl to finally go with me to see........a Taylor Swift concert. 

Then there she was my perfect Christmas present...all for me. When she first looked at me I could feel the connection. Everyone said she would stare at me and smile so sweetly...she loved me back. I was over the moon head over heels in love with her and she felt the same way......until the daddy infection came upon her. Yes....she saw daddy and fell in love. She turned six months and was enchanted by her father. Her first word was mommy but when she discovered daddy she has never again said mommy. This man walks through the door and all she has to hear is his voice and she begins smiling, desperate to get near him and then she smiles ear to ear as if he was Brad Pitt in the flesh (more like Kevin Bacon for me). She even sings him a song..."dada dada dada dada". She adores him and now the three of them idolize   him. What is it with this man? I know he is still cute at forty and all and he does know how to tickle well but come on....he's not Brad Pitt (no Kevin Bacon). But they love him and again I found myself looking in to their world of daddy's the best. I was again alone without any fans. 

And then........I got a puppy. Ginger loves me....she thinks I am a cool, pretty and fun. She goes crazy when I get home, she greets and gives me tons of licks. She idolizes me...me...just me. Whenever I see her playing with Fabio and enjoying herself too much I throw her a pig skin or a bone. Just so she knows I am the one who gives her fun things...I am the cool one. Can't have her get the infection too. 

No matter who is her favorite. I love my princess and my two knights and I will always be their greatest fan. 

The tooth fairy is one strange fairy!!!

Lucas has finally lost one tooth and was sure excited that he was visited by the tooth fairy....and she left him $20 (daddy got a little out of hand). He had never thought about the tooth fairy before until the tooth wiggled out (I actually did the pulling..tugging... and yanking). He was super excited that somehow he can make some good money for all the teeth he was going to loose. "Mommy if everyone just pulled out their teeth the tooth fairy can help the poor people in the world. I bet there is a poor toothless homeless man that would have liked that idea". 

Then Lucas started thinking more (enter my lies.). He begins, "mommy I am beginning to think the tooth fairy is a little strange.  Why does she collect teeth?  I mean I am sure kids love getting the money but what does she do with all those teeth. Isn't it a little strange that her house is full of people's teeth.  Isn't that strange". Fear came over his eyes. 

I actually never really thought about that   As a child I was so happy that I was getting money for my teeth that what she did with them or why she wanted them never crossed my mind. Then when I found out who the tooth fairy really was I really didn't care. 

I had to come up with something. I couldn't let him know the thruth, I still wanted his innocence to remain intact. I still needed that same lie to work with the younger ones so I did what any mother would do.....I lied. I have become such an expert these days that I didn't have to think really hard. Before I knew it there it was coming out of my mouth. "She needs teeth to make fairy dust....how do you think fairy dust is done. Only a fairy can make teeth into magical fairy dust". Oh my. 

He bought it. He said with a smile and beaming twinkling eyes " that's why fairy dust is white. That makes sense mommy. I feel so much better. I was beginning to fear the tooth fairy thinking she was some kind of monsters in disguise wearing pretty clothes with wings". 

Phew!!!!  That bought me some time.

This kids makes my brain hurt. 😄

There he is.....!!!!!

Sometimes in the chaos of everyday life, with one kid fighting with another, dog chasing the cat, bird chirping loudly because someone forgot to cover her, parents calling because they haven't heard from you and wanted to know if you are still alive......you forget....you forget that the other adult in your house isn't a roommate that you are sharing bills or responsibility with...it is your husband, the guy you chose to marry and have the kids...the dog...the cat....the bird....it's the partner you chose to be with.  I know......that was ........a long long sentence. My fourth grade teacher Ms. Garrett would not have approved. 

Do you get me though?  That guy or partner or significant other that lives with you.....yeah him.....you actually dig him, at times like him and you love him ....really you do and actually at times forget he is there. 

My mornings are crazy during the week. I get up..work for an hour...then Milah usually wakes up after. I change her diaper, put on her fancy pink clothes and give her a bottle. Then I feed the cat and feed the dog. Usually by this time our Ginger has come back from her walk with daddy and is full of energy. I start breakfast. Boys wake up, (daddy is gone by this point) I make sure they get their morning chores done and dressed. Then it's breakfast while the kids are eating I rush to get dressed. Then I make lunches or pack the lunches in the book bags and put everything by the door. Breakfast is over, I brushed their teeth, comb their hair, pack the car, put ginger in her crate, say hello to the bird Pearl, change her food if it's needed, kiss Bashfull our cat goodbye, put the alarm on and I'm off. First stop is Lucas at the bus stop, then drive Milah to my parents, drop her off then it's off to Noah's school. After dropping Noah off, I drive back to my house and switch cars...I get in my work car and start my field work. At the end of the day, it happens all over again. I drive home, switch cars, drive to pick up Noah, then Milah and back at my house to get Lucas from the bus stop. And it doesn't end there......no sir.....the second phase of the day begins. 

Usually after Lucas gets off the bus, it's homework with both kids, then it's sports like swimming, soccer practice, piano lessons, religion classes or tae kwon doe. Happening on different days. Then I cook.....a home cook meal. Only Friday's do we do pizza night but every night I cook meals that include protein and veggies and good stuff for growing kids. Then it's bath time, book time and then bed for the kids. Then for me it's work again for about two hours every Monday thru Thursday. 

The whole time Fabio is there. Helping with homework, taking them a bath, reading to them, clearing the table, putting them to bed, yes he is there and we talk but it's all about the kids nothing about us. Usually by the time I finish work he is sleeping and the whole week is the same. We only get to catch up on the weekends. And thank God for texting, I talk to him more through texting these days. His mom told me the other day, "oh Fabio didn't tell you". Haven't spoken to him in three days I responded. She said you haven't seen him in three days she asked, I said "oh I have seen him, I just haven't spoken to him about anything but about the kids". We are two ships passing through the night. 

We laugh that we have no time for each other and through the week we do text each other " I love you, miss you,...along with take out the garbage, don't forget sports night is Friday oh and we need milk. 

One day we will have all the time in the world when our kids leave our nest until then we have to keep going and never forget how we got here. It's just like that saying 

"It all began when two people fell in love". 

"I promise I will not poop in the playground anymore".

"I promise I will not poop in the playground anymore"....yep....that's what our four year old son Noah says to Fabio and I every morning during breakfast when we are advising him and his brother about how to behave at school. For Lucas is "focus and listen". For Noah it was that too until the Poop Incident. Last week I happily went to pick up my sweet boy from school. I waited anxiously outside his door, couldn't wait to see him run straight into my arms. Even though he is my crazy maniac....that's exhausts me....and hurts my ears from his loud singing and his loud imitations of bombs going off and transformers killing decepticons (or something like that)...during the day away from him......I miss him. Noah is in Pre-k at the same school and with the same teacher that his brother Lucas had. So I know this teacher quite a long time. She's tough but good. 

Other parents start arriving, some excited, some wishing they had one more hour.  The door opens and out start coming out the kids. His teacher catches my eyes and start smiling from ear to ear "oh Mrs. Barone I have a new one for you...you are not going to believe this". She takes me to the side before noah comes out and proceeded to tell me that all the kids had gone to the school playground that day. When suddenly some kids came running to her and started screaming "Noah pooped....Noah popped...!!!!"  Just so you know Noah is potty trained, has been since he was 2 1/2. I was mortified. She continued with the story. She said she went and found Noah near the scene of the crime and he confirmed that yes he had indeed pooped in the back of the playground (at least he was honest). He said not to worry he had covered it up with leaves. He had done such a good job that even his teacher and the custodian could not find it. 

I could not believe it. I was mortified that my little boy had pulled his pants down, squatted and mooned everyone driving on that road. It's a busy road too. My sons rear end had been plastered all over kings park road. 

I waited to talk to him over dinner that way Fabio could be there. His explanation was that he was having too much fun and he saw his friend peeing in the back of the playground. Noah said he needed to poop and didn't want to miss the fun so he thought he would do it like our dog Ginger does pooping in the grass. 

At dinner my husband and I wanted to scold him but the fact that he wAs honest made us proud. Lucas heard what happened and laughed and said "that's what he does in the back yard, he pees out there because he doesn't want to come in and miss all the fun". Oh great now our yard is filled with Noah and gingers pee all over. 

So every morning we remind Lucas "focus and listen" and before we get to Noah he says "and I promise not to poop in the playground" 

Oh boy...wonder what Kindergarten holds for us.   

The power of three.

If you read my blog, keep up with me on Facebook or just know me you know since 12-22-13 my life has changed. I have changed. Completely!!!  I actually like myself. All it took was having my third ...the power of three. You see I believe I was a sane person before my third, I believe I was.....normal....not anymore people....I have lost my mind and I kind of like it. 

The power of three has taught me so many things and shown me that I was living the wrong way. Here are the many reasons why life now....is better than it ever was. 

1. Cursing.......

I have never been a girl with a dirty mouth. Nope, not me. Ask anyone who knew me in elementary, high school and college. I did not say bad words. My parents never did so I didn't either. When Lucas came I knew that I would enforce it on my husband (who needed help in that department). We did wonderful, never cursed in front of them or away from them. (He tried :( poor guy). Noah came And I was close to letting them out but I held my tongue. Even Fabio got better except for that time the pipes burst in the office and the kids learned the "Shit" word over and over again in case they didn't get it the first few times. But I digress, we were doing excellent. Enter our precious Milah. She is a great baby and very easy but it's the other two in combination with her that have driven me to the edge. I curse...yes I do and I love it. I am all day swearing, fuck this fuck that, screw him...screw you....pick a lane asshole.....all of the wonderful words that I never knew before. I knew them but i didn't know how they felt. I didn't know how they would make me feel. They release all the tension and built up anger that I always kept inside. I don't want to lose it with my kids. I still don't curse in front of them (well I actually do say "shit" sometimes but hey they have already been exposed to that from their father so I say it's a freebee). I feel energized when I let out the curses I feel liberated. Might sound crazy to some but hey I did warn you I am crazy. So who gives a shit. 😄

2 I never said the lords name in vain. People would laugh at me in college if someone ever said his name in vain. I quickly would do the sign of the cross. Now, Jesus is in my mouth all day every day. "Jesus help me". "Jesus, please make these kids go to bed". Jesus, eat your damn food". You like how I combined 1 and 2 together. Ok, I know Jesus might not be happy with this but he gave me three, I think he knew what may happen. 

3. Who Cares!!!!!  I use to worry if my kids made a scene, or hurt someone's feeling, or talked back. They are going to think I am a bad mother....they probably think I don't care or that I am working mom and thats why my kids acts like that. You know what.......who cares. If you have kids, you have been there, if you don't have kids you will be there too and if you are old and don't remember let me help you out you were there too. I am more relax now, I pick up my screaming kid, I yell at the smart one that's talking back and tell him you just wait till we get home and I apologize for my kid, make him apologize and never have the play date again. I don't want to be reminded of that   

4 I can always be late. If I have to go somewhere or be somewhere I use the three kid card. "I am sorry I have three kids and it was hard getting them all ready". I always get the sympathy look which inside I am sure they are saying why the hell did I have three.  I used to care about the sympathy card but if you have read number 3 you know I don't care. I use it to my advantage. 

5 Recently we lost my sweet puffball, our cat who was 17 years old. Some may say, use sometime to grieve but no I couldn't if I even thought about the loss of puffball I would have needed to be hospitalized so instead I got a dog. Friends and coworkers say I am crazy. My husband thinks I am crazy. I am, I agree but I wanted to bring happiness into my kids eyes again so I added more work for myself and it was worth it. 

6 Boob job. Yes after nursing three kids I have been left with nothing that only a  Victoria secret bra can only revive. I would have never thought of surgery back in the day but I never thought my breast will be what they are today. So I said to Fabio a lift would be greatly appreciated. No objections on his part. 

7 we will get there when we get there. Yes, back in the day Fabio and I would rush everywhere. We would be the first ones there and would be all stressed out. Now, we get there when we get there. Yes we try to be on time but we also don't get stressed. Wherever we go, when they see us walk in with our entourage they know why we are late. 

8 I am a hero. I get looks and comments when I walk in with my 7, 4 and 6 month old. They look at me like I have gone to war. They give me extra time to fill out the  paper work, they bumped me up on the line before my kids go crazy and disturb their beautiful ambiance. They change the channel to cartoons so my kids are quiet too. I get special treatment and I get told I am super woman. They say, wow you work full time, have three kids and are a wife, you are amazing. Some may get insulted but like I said in number 3....who cares. 

9  My house is a mess and I don't apologize. Listen I work full time, I have three kids, a dog, a cat and a bird who is going to outlive us and Lucas and his family will have to take care of her. I also cook home cook meals every day but Fridays because it's pizza night. Yes we eat at 7 pm but I cook. I do have a cleaning lady but she only comes once a month which reminds me I have to have her come twice a month. The house still gets dirty and toys and clothes are all over the place. But I don't care because I try to do my best and I also don't invite anyone over. 

10. Finally, Fabio and I get along better. Yes we have our arguments and our fights but we are better. Maybe because we know we are stuck for life. Who else would understand our life better than us and we know that we couldn't do this crazy life alone and  it wouldn't be fun without each other. After all, we created this life. 

 Since 12/22/13 I have three children, lost a cat and gained a dog. My life is chaotic but it sure is entertaining. Yes I am crazy but I wasn't living until....... now. 

Happy Mother's Day!!!

I am a lucky wife and mother. I can't possibly ask for more. My husband came up with an idea for Mother's Day a few years ago. A Mother's Day off. Yes, meaning I am single again for a day. Without a husband and kids to take care of. For a day, usually a day before Mother's Day I get to sleep in. I get up whenever I like, I get breakfast in bed, get to lay in bed watching lifetime movies all day. Last year I learned about sexting. Had no idea what that was until I saw the movie about sexting. I learned a lot. I spend all day watching lifetime movies, laying in bed in my pj's. How do I eat you may ask?  My husband gives me my food in a tray and leaves it outside the door and texts me when he leaves it there so I can retrieve it. If I get thirsty I text and it's deliver to my door in no time. The kids know not to enter Mommys room, knock or bother mommy. It's Mommys day off. They respect it. I hear them in the house, in the backyard playing saying "it's Mommys day off, we have to be good boys". At night before bedtime, they come in and we snuggle for a bit and then they are off to bed and I am still in mine. I get up take a shower and put another pair of pj's and then I am back in bed to catch up with another lifetime movie. 

On the Sunday that is Mother's Day we go see my mother-in-law upstate for brunch and then before coming home go see my mother for dessert. Still on Mothers Day, my Fabsters and my boys treat me special and like a princess. This year I am celebreting a very special Mother's Day because I got my princess making my family complete. 

On Father's Day you may think he gets a Father's Day off too but he doesn't. Fabio actually wants to spend extra time with the kids, playing with them and going to parks, aquariums, doing any and all activities with them. I felt guilty at first but now I don't. I need that day off to recharge. Some moms or dads may not need that but I do and I am lucky enough to have a husband that let's me have it without throwing guilt into it or making me feel about it. Actually I never knew I needed it or could have it until he came up with it. When I tell my friends and family about my day off they either think I am a terrible mother or are jealous of it. Either way, I think some moms secretly wish they could have it.  I know I am glad I do. 

Happy Mothers Day to all the mommies around the world. May you have a wonderful day. 

Our Second Honeymoon.

Fabio and I were in the Carribbean celebrating our ten year anniversary. Eleven years ago Fabio went to Puerto Rico to propose to me while I was working there. It was romantic and we decided every ten years we would visit the Carribbean and spent one night in Puerto Rico. Forward Eleven years later and three kids and neither Fabio or I are the same person. We are ten years older, ten years more worn out, tired, RA and digestive problems. The only things that have stayed the same are the fact that we are still in love and Fabio is still a crazy adventurer. I use to be a little but the older I get and with each kid I gave birth to I became more nervous, more cautious and less adventurer. I am not the same. I am nervous Nelly. So during our week of celebrating our anniversary Fabio wanted to do the same things that we did ten years ago when we got engaged and the things we did during our honeymoon. Take in mind that although Fabio is still adventurous he still gets tired and his joints still hurt the next morning but he doesn't care he still goes for the thrill and has no fear. 

He wanted to ride ATV'S, we did that ten years ago during our honeymoon in Hawaii. I kind of liked it minus all the mud in my face.  This time I had not brought any ugly, dirty old clothes to ruin with all that mud.  I said no and he begged me to do it this time and I will be in his ATV. That scared me even more. He is crazy, he would probably crash our ATV or worse. I agreed but thank God we didn't get to do it too much on the agenda. Next, he wanted to do zip lining. What?!!?!!  Why would I do that?  What if I fell?  I couldn't. Then I felt bad and said I would go wth him and then just see him zip lining and then we can go home. Thank God the concierge told us that it is a hiking zip lining trip. We would have to hike and then to get to the other side everyone would have to zip lined to finish the hike. What??!!!  I would have no choice but to zip line. Absolutely not!!!!  I am not being forced to do it. That was scratched of the list. 

Next, when we arrived in Puerto Rico he wanted to climb "El Yunque". It is a national rainforest. We had climbed to the top eleven years ago but I was in shape then with a lot of energy. I agreed only if we could climb half of it. He agreed and we did. The whole way up I never complained and he thanked me for not complaining but in my head I was cursing him out and praying that I didn't fall off. When we got to the waterfall in the half way mark Fabio got in the water and was like a child in a water park. I just sat and smiled. I was too tired to bathe and could not wait to climb back down and out of my sweaty clothes. 

Next he wanted to go snorkeling and visit an island off Puerto Rico called Culebra. I agreed. We snorkeled but the coral seemed to be closer than the coral we saw in Hawaii. They warned us not to get too close or it will cut us. Fabio and I had our sign language under water to communicate but when I signaled to go back because we were getting too close to the coral, he pushed us forward. Then I panicked and started fighting him to go back and then I touch something I think it was ....a leave..... of a plant ....down there and.... I swam so fast pulling Fabio with me. When we got on the boat he was laughing  saying we were not that close but I knew we were. I was so mad, this is why I wouldn't go with him on the ATV. He began diving off the boat....and swimming, I stayed nicely in my chair on the boat. Then we visited Culebra. They told us when walking on the sand on the beach we should be careful not to step on certain parts because of turtle nesting. If we did we would get arrested. I of course a rule and law follower decided not to take the risk and stayed on the boat. Not Fabio...he swam so fast to the beach. I just watched him. If he got arrested it would be his fault. Then I got lonely, with everyone off the boat. Then one of the crew members, young guy at least 23, began being a little too friendly and flirting. I quickly swam to the beach. It was flattering but I wanted my hubby. I swam to the beach and prayed that I did not encountered any turtle nesting. I didn't and it was a nice time. 

We did do a lot of fun things though. We renewed our vows by the beach, got drunk together, took our first selfies and ate so much we gained

5 pounds each. It was lovely to reconnect. He wants to do this every ten years. God help me.  

How do we know its a girl?

It's a girl!!!!  These were the words Fabio and I heard from my doctor when our daughter Milah was born. We wept like babies. Could it really be happening?  Could God have blessed us and our families with a girl finally. Our families on both side had desperately been waiting for a girl. On my side there are four grandsons. On my husbands there are three grandsons, my mother in law had two sons and my father in law was one of four boys. No girls!!!!  I had prepared myself to hear the words "it's a boy". Of course we would have welcomed our baby boy with open arms but the thought of a girl....of pink bows....pink dresses was too much not to dream about. So to learn that we had our baby girl was like we won the lottery. It was so worth waiting till the end to know that she wwe had a princess. 

Enters my curious Lucas who asks tons of questions.  Lucas had always asked me why do I pee sitting. I had explained that girls had different parts and he wanted to see how my part was different than his. That was not happening. 

When Lucas and Noah came to the hospital to meet their little sister they were so excited but then we're confused when they saw her. I think they expected her to be wearing pink, long hair and pink bows so that in their minds she was a girl. But what they saw was a tiny baby wrapped up like a burrito looking like a boy. She actually did have a lot of hair but it didn't have pink bows. So to them the baby looked nothing like a girl. Lucas asked "how do we know she is a girl?". To which we all answered "she is a girl trust Us". He wants proof, a sure indication that the baby girl he had wished for was actually given to him. He had asked Santa for a baby sister and had been a good boy so he needed to have proof that what he got was a sister. Noah could care less. He was just upset that mommy had to stay in the hospital with the baby, boy or girl he was pissed that his mommy would not be with him. 

When Milah and I got home two days later Milah still did not look like a girl in Lucas eyes. After all, all I had at home was blue clothes after having two boys so I had to  put her boy clothes to which he responded "mommy why is she wearing blue pajamas that say "daddy's boy" (damn it he could read). I explained that mommy had no pink clothes, mommy didn't know we were having a girl. 

A few days later, I began to receive packages from my little sister with tons of girl outfits. My mother in laws also bought her outfits and I went crazy in pink. I washed everything and could hardly wait to put her pink clothes and finally bows in her hair. I asked Lucas " does she look like a girl now?"  To which he replied " better but there is still something missing". 

Two weeks later after her belly button was cleared we took Milah her first bath. Aha....Lucas noticed she didn't have a pee pee. I didn't cover Milah or pushed them away from seeing her naked so I knew he would be aware of the difference " how come she doesn't have a pee pee?"  I responded " girls don't, only boys do". He says "that's what girls have, that's what you have". He got it. "Oh I know that's how the doctor knew she was a girl ", he says. Glad this conversation was over and I felt relieve until Fabio reminded me that I had taught this lesson in Milahs expense. I had shown her goods to her brothers. Something I am sure she will hold over me for years to come. For now, we had our girl and everyone knows what parts we all have.